I’m happy for you, be happy for me.

Happy

I ran into Sam (not his real name) the newlywed son of an old friend of mine, at CVS. He is Matthew's age (28) and I had not seen him for a while. Sam was always a cute kid, but man oh man, he is now a magnificent adult--tall, handsome, confident. He was dressed in his investment advisor clothes, which made him look all the more impressive. How is married life, I asked him and he told me it was great and that... he and his wife were expecting! Oh my gosh! Congratulations! Your mom must be so … [Read more...]

Wanted: Special Needs Parent Role Models

tea

One thing they don't tell you when you become the parent of a child with special needs is that a good role model will keep you afloat.   Mine was Kathy. She  was the first parent of a child with special needs that I connected with. Her son John and my son Matthew were in the kindergarten together in a special day class. John, I learned, had cerebral palsy. Kathy had a bemused smile on her face when she told me this. I wondered what that was all about, but it made me feel … [Read more...]

25 things about me: a brief history of motherhood, autism style

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1) My husband and I planned on having our first child after two years of marriage.Matthew beat us by 2 months. Hopeful parents 2) I took Matthew on a job interview when he was eight weeks old because I couldn't bear to leave him with a babysitter. 3) The first person that told me that Matthew, then three, was developmentally delayed was a speech therapist. She was also the first person who didn't mention how adorable he was. 4) My husband and I coached Matthew before his next … [Read more...]

“This is not a book about a young man with a disability, but rather a story of love, adaptation, and acceptance.”

Matthew

  Read First Three Chapters Kindle or your favorite local bookstore. Nervous Laughter When I was eight years old, Uncle Russell came to visit. He was my mother's cousin, but everyone called him Uncle Russell. He was twenty years old and had a severe case of cerebral palsy. Russell was pigeon-toed as I had never seen before, causing his knees to face each other. He walked in a spastic, bouncing stumble. His hands were gnarled and bent at the wrist, fingers curled, in a way … [Read more...]

Autism: How I defused a scary meltdown unscathed

Our family was having dinner one Sunday evening when Matthew, who has autism, became distressed because his potatoes were touching his meat. My husband Peter, who was tired after pruning trees all day, told Matthew in a loud voice "Don't be ridiculous, just eat your dinner." Matthew yelled no, that he was the boss of his food, and picked up his plate and threw it across the room. Peter was ready to lunge out of his chair in anger, as were Matthews two younger brothers, but instead they stayed … [Read more...]